ALTERNATE HEADLINE: pneumonia-stricken grandmother breathes on random child

A gaggle of reporters two hours after Hillary Clinton stumbled and fainted even as her aides held her arms:

“Mrs. Clinton, what happened?”

Hillary: “It’s a great day in New York!”

The muted response out of rival Donald Trump: “I hope she gets well soon.”

We all know Hillary Clinton fell and hit her head in 2012, leaving a host of complications that her doctors claimed have all cleared. She’s healthy, they tell us.

Internet sleuths are trying to foist the notion that presidential candidate Hillary Clinton is a puppet being dragged around by nefarious “handlers” directed by a higher order. Whatevs.

Hillary clearly has some medical issues. Her staggering, weak-kneed faint while departing the 9/11 memorial is very telling.

The problem is that Hillary’s people aren’t telling. Much.

Even Liberal media stalwarts like The Washington Post are tired of Team Clinton’s constant stonewalling.

The New York Times is “watching and wincing” as Hillary stumbles.

That’s no whip. That’s no nae nae.

Several hours after the seizure-like episode, Hillary’s doctor released a statement saying that she had been treating the former Secretary of State for pneumonia. No one explained why Team Clinton reps did not release that information immediately following the stumble and carry into the “Scooby Van.”

And if Hillary has pneumonia, should she be breathing all over some admirer’s child on a NYC sidewalk? No conscientious grandmother would risk infecting a child. Hillary also spent face time with countless top tier leaders at the 9/11 memorial.

Did she warn all of them that she had pneumonia? Where’s that Michael Jackson surgeon’s mask?

I’d call Dr. Drew for a thought but he’s been missing since last Tuesday.

Meanwhile, Donald Trump continues rabble-rousing at his fistfight inducing rallies.

58 more days until America picks one of these stellar candidates to be its 45th president.