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Cardinals win at Duke, Cat fans unmoved, Beasman praying for March Madness rematch with U of L

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Fresh Kimble and Malik Williams celebrate Louisville’s victory at Duke, January 18, 2020

THE BEASMAN Louisville beats duke
SHUT YOUR STUPID MOUTH ABOUT EVERBODY LOVES SEEIN’ LOSERVILLE BEATIN’ DUKE. I’M PART OF EVERBODY AND I DON’T LIKE IT ONE BIT, DADGUMMIT! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! IF BOTH TEAM BUSSES FOR DUKE AND LOSERVILLE WENT OVER A CLIFF, KENTUCKY FANS WOULD REJOICE BY BURNIN’ COUCHES! Ls DOWN AND DUKIES DOWN!

Y’ALL BOTH DEVILS WHO OUGHTA BE BURNT AT THE STAKE LIKE MY GRANNY’S COUCH! THE ONLY TIME ME AND ALL MY WILDCAT BUDDIES CELLER-MABRATE IS WHEN OUR SAINTLY KENTUCKY WILDCATS BEAT DUKE! TRUE BLUE KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS GIT SICK TO THEIR STOMACHS WHENEVER LOSERVILLE GITS GOOD NEWS. U UH KAY FANS ONLY CARE ABOUT U UH KAY! GO CATS! GO BLUE! COME SEE ABOUT IT!

I KNOW YOUR LITTLE BALD HEAD IS ALL SWOLE UP CUZ U OF SMELL JUMPED KENTUCKY IN THE PO. THAT’S ONLY CUZ THEM ROTTEN CARDINALS WON THREE ROAD GAMES IN A ROW AND ONE OF ‘EM WAS DUKE. BIG WHOOPTY DO. COACH K SAID Y’ALL WAS BULLIES AND THUGS AND FOR ONCE I AGREE WITH THAT RAT FACED DUKE COACH.

UofL freshman David Johnson, a Trinity High School phenom, dominated Duke the entire game.

SO GO AHEAD AND ACT LIKE Y’ALL IS GOODER THAN U UH KAY. WHO WON WHEN WE PLAYED EACH OTHER? YOU KNOW THE CATS DOMMERATED YOU LITTLE BROTHER NOBODIES, YOU CROSS-EYED, SNAGGLE TOOTH, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, NECK TATTOO, WHISKEY FOR BREAKFAST, MAKIN BABIES OUT OF WEDLOCK, G.E.D. FLUNKIN U OF SMELL BOOTLICKER. U UH KAY WHOOPED YOU GOOD, DADGUMMIT, SO SUCK ON THAT TIL WE GIT YOU AGAIN IN MARCH MADNESS! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs)

THE A.C.C. AIN’T AS TOUGH AS THE S.E.C. AND YOU KNOW IT, YOU BALD HAIRED, TWO-FACED, TRAITOR TURNCOAT WENT-TO-U-UH-KAY-BUT-CHEERS-FOR-U-OF-SMELL BENERDICK ARNOLD! YOU SUCK LARRY MINNER! THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS IS STILL GONNA WIN IT ALL CUZ WE IS THE BIG BLUE!

John Calipari ejected at Arkansas, January 18, 2020 (photo: Herald Leader)

COACH CAL GOT THROWED OUTTA THAT ARKANSAS GAME CUZ HE KNOWED HIS WILDCATS WOULD RALLY TO WIN! PLUS, CAL SAYS THERE IS 4 MILLION COACHES IN KENTUCKY WHO CAN PICK UP THE SLACK WHEN HE’S GONE. (laffs)

KINNY PAYNE AIN’T NO REAL COACH, HE’S JUST A FIGGERHEAD LIKE PURDY HAIR ROBIC AND THAT OTHER ASS-SISTANT COACH WHAT’S HIS FACE. WHEN COACH CAL GITS THROWED OUT, ALL US BIG BLUE COACHES IN THE STANDS SHOUT OUT DI-RECTIONS TO OUR GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCAT PLAYERS.

WE HOLLER STUFF LIKE “SCORE MORE POINTS, DADGUMMIT!” AND WE HOLLER “GUARD SOMEBODY, YOU DOOFUS!” SO IT DON’T TAKE NO EINSTEIN TO FIGGER THAT OUT BUT US 4 MILLION EXTRA U UH KAY COACHES JUST WANNA HELP!

KINNY PAYNE AND THEM OTHER RUM DUMMIES MIGHT AS WELL EAT POPCORN AND LET US BIG BLUE FANS IN THE STANDS LEAD US TO VICTREE LIKE WE DONE IN ARKANSAS! (laffs) I LOVE IT! SO HAVE YOUR LITTLE MOMENT IN THE SUN THINKIN Y’ALL U OF SMELL CARDINALS IS GOODER THAN YOU IS! IT WILL JUST MAKE YOUR TEARS MORE DELICIOUS WHEN THE GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCATS SMACK YOU IN THE MOUTH AND SEND YOU HOME FROM MARCH MADNESS AGAIN! (laffs)

(if San Francisco wins vs Green Bay)
OH, AND I’M GLAD YOUR GREEN GAY BUTT PACKERS AIN’T GOIN TO NO SUPER BO SO WE DON’T GOTTA LISTEN TO YOUR STUPID LOUDMOUTH LARRY CHEESEHEAD BRAGGIN’ FOR TWO WEEKS! YOUR PACKERS IS LACKERS JUST LIKE YOUR LOSERVILLE FRAUDS. SO NOW YOU CAN GO TRAITOR TURNCOAT ON YOUR PACKERS BY CHEERING FOR YOUR SAN FRANCISSY-CO FARTY MINNERS! COME ON OUT OF THE CLOSET AND ADMIT THAT SAN FRANCISSY-CO IS WHO YOU REALLY IDEN-TER-FY WITH, YOU SPINELESS FRAUD! GO CATS! GO BLUE! AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR, WE ALREADY KNOW WHO GONNA WIN THE NEXT 10 SUPER BOWLS…THE TEAM THAT’S GOT LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR AS THEIR QUARTERBACK! GO CATS! GO BIG BLUE! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT!

(if Green Bay wins vs San Francisco)
I’M GONNA THROW MY RADIO IN THE GARBAGE CUZ AIN’T NO WAY I CAN LISTEN TO YOU KEEP TAWKIN BOUT U OF SMELL BEATIN DUKE PLUS NONSTOP CHEESEHEAD GREEN GAY BUTT PACKERS SUPER BO HYPE. TOO MUCH LOUDMOUTH LARRY AND NOT ENOUGH GO BIG BLUE FOR ME! I’LL JUST LISSEN TO THE MATT JONES PODCAST OVER AND OVER AND OVER TIL MY EARS BLEED. LEAST THEY’LL BLEED KENTUCKY BLUE! GO CATS! GO BLUE! AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR, WE ALREADY KNOW WHO GONNA WIN THE NEXT 10 SUPER BOWLS…THE TEAM THAT’S GOT LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR AS THEIR QUARTERBACK! GO CATS! GO BIG BLUE! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT!

Louisville’s Raanan Hershberg crushes it on CBS’ Late Late Show with James Corden

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One of my favorite recurring guests on 840WHAS is Louisville comedian Raanan Hershberg. He’s been on the radio with me for years and always bring fresh material.

Terry Meiners and Raanan Hershberg, WHAS studios, December 2019

It was fun to see him on CBS the other night delivering a lot of the jokes that he honed on the radio or onstage at The Bard’s Town theater.

Way to go, Raanan. Outstanding job!

Here’s our most recent radio interview on 840WHAS.

Cats stunned again, The Beasman wants Eddie Sutton and Kenny Sky Walker to take charge, and wants iHeart to fire Larry Minner for smirking

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THE BEASMAN cats lose to south caramaliner
HOW COME THEY DINT FIRE YOU WHEN THEY CLEANED HOUSE THE OTHER DAY? I JUST BOUT VOMITED WHEN I HEARED YOUR GUTLESS WEASEL VOICE ON THE WH&S TODAY. WHY IS Y’ALL LAUGHIN BOUT STUFF TODAY? THIS HERE IS A BONER-FIED BIG BLUE NATION TRAGEDY WE GOT GOIN ON AND Y’ALL ON THERE MAKIN JOKES!

MOST KENTUCKY KIDS COULDN’T GO TO SCHOOL DAY CUZ OF DEE-PRESSION. DOCTORS IS HANDIN OUT FREE PROZAC. KENTUCKY IS A DEE-ZASTER ZONE…NO JOY NOWHERE! (cry) THIS IS MORE HORRIBLE-ER THAN LOSIN TO TENNERSEE LASS YEAR. (cry) GO AHEAD AND MOCK ME, YOU SNAGGLE TOOTH, CROSS-EYED, U OF SMELL BOOTLICKIN HAS BEEN NOBODY!

COME ON, GIMME YOUR BEST SHOT, LARRY MINNER! THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS DONE BLOWED ANOTHER 14 POINT LEAD IN SOUTH CARAMALINER AND SO NOW ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS GOT TO HEAR YOUR UGLY FACE SMIRKIN BOUT IT! LEMME HAVE IT, LARRY! DANCE ON MY GRAVE! (cry)

I CAINT BLEEVE I HEART RADIO DINT FIRE YOUR SORRY ASS WITH THE REST OF THEM CARDINAL LOVERS! YOU MUSTA BEEN HIDIN UNDER MATT JONES’ DESK WHEN THEY COME THRU FIRIN EVERBODY. YOU SHOULDA BEEN THROWED OUT TO PASTURE TWUNNY YEARS AGO WHEN YOU BECAME SLICK RICK BUTEENO’S GAY LOVER UP ON BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN.

I TURNT ON THE RADIO HOPIN TO HEAR MATT JONES HELPIN ALL US SAD CAT FANS START TO HEAL WITH HIS WORDS OF WISDOM BUT INSTEAD I GIT STUPID YOU. SAVE US, MATT JONES! TELL US BOUT HOW COACH CAL AIN’T NO FRAUD AND HOW WE BEAT U OF SMELL SO IT’S STILL A GREAT SEASON. (cry) I’M THINKIN MAYBE WE NEED SOMEBODY TO PUT OL JOHN CALIPARDI OUT TO PASTURE THOUGH. THE GAME DONE PAST HIM BY. WE NEED KINNY SKY WALKER TO STEP IN AND TEACH THESE YOUNG WILDCATS HOW TO BLEEVE IN THE BIG BLUE! COME ON, KINNY! AND BRANG GOOSE GIVENS AND SAM BOWIE WITH YOU.

SAVE THESE CATS BEFORE “COACH CAL-DON’T-CARE-NO” RUINS ‘EM FOREVER! (cry) IT’S BAD ENOUGH TO SEE OUR GOOD AND CLASSY CATS LOSE BUT THEN WE ALSO GOT TO SEE THAT IDIOT SOUTH CARAMALINER FAN DANCIN AND MOCKIN ASHTON HAGAR WHEN HE FOULT OUT.

HOW COME A CAT FAN DINT JUMP DOWN THERE AND PUNCH THAT PUNK GAMECOCK FAN? IS WE GITTIN SOFT, CAT FANS? THERE WAS A TIME WHEN ANYBODY MOCKED U UH KAY WOUNT UP IN A BODY BAG. NOT NO MORE. NOW WE JUST LET ERRBODY MOCK US AND WE JUST HANG OUR HEADS IN SHAME! (cry)

Jermaine Couisnard beats UK at the buzzer, January 15, 2020

DADGUM U OF SMELL WINS ON THE ROAD AGAIN AN U UH KAY LOSES ON THE ROAD SO NOW Y’ALL GONNA JUMP US IN THE PO AGAIN. (cry) AN NOW THE CATS IS #67 IN THE RPI AND THEY IS PICKIN US TO LOSE 5 OF OUR NEXT 8 GAMES! IT AIN’T BEEN THIS BAD SINCE BILLY CLYDE WAS DRINKIN BOOZE IN OUR HUDDLES WHILE SOMEBODY ELSE WAS DRAWIN UP PLAYS! (cry) IF BOBBY PETRINKO CAN GIT HIRED AGAIN THEN MAYBE U UH KAY NEEDS TO GO FIND EDDIE SUTTON AND GIVE HIM ANOTHER SHOT HERE AT KENTUCKY. HIM AND KINNY SKY WALKER COULD GIT THIS THING TURNT AROUND!

John Calipari, Eddie Sutton

I’LL GO GIT A STACK OF EMERY AIR FREIGHT ENVER-LOPES READY SO EDDIE CAN START SENDIN CASH TO REE-CRUITS SO KENTUCKY CAN GIT REAL PLAYERS AGAIN LIKE IN THE GOOD OL DAYS. (cry) BYE BYE, COACH CAL. LET YOUR WIFE DRIVE WHEN YOU LEAVE TOWN CUZ YOU OBVIOUSLY DON’T KNOW NOTHIN BOUT TAKIN CHARGE. (cry) COME ON, IHEART. FIRE LARRY MINNER! FIRE LARRY MINNER! FIRE LARRY MINNER!

PUT MATT JONES ON WH&S! HIRE MATT JONES! HIRE MATT JONES! HIRE MATT JONES! THIS HERE IS A BONER-FIED BIG BLUE NATION TRAGEDY TIME!

Here’s a soundbite to use the day after the election regardless of outcome

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THE BEASMAN – With Lamar Jackson beaten, is Lynn Bowden Jr the next savior of the NFL

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THE BEASMAN lynn bowie jr for MVP
LARRREEEEEE! ALMOST EVER-THANG IS BEAUTY-FULL IN WILDCAT COUNTRY, LARRY MINNER! IT’S WILDCAT BLUE FROM SEA TO SHINY SEA! (laffs) COACH CAL AND THE CATS IS CLICKIN ON ALL CYLANTROS, HEADIN BACK TO #1. NOW ALL YOU SNAGGLE TOOTH, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, GOLD CHAIN WEARIN, NECK TATTOO LOVIN U OF SMELL LOUDMOUTHS GOT TO SHUT YOUR CAKEHOLES ABOUT LAY-MAR JACKSON! (laffs) I LOVE IT!

LAY-MAR IS A FAILURE CUZ U UH KAY WILDCAT WESLEY WOODYARD AND HIS TENNERSEE TITANS WHOOPED HIM GOOD! (laffs) BLEEVE ME…LAY-MAR GONNA MEMBER THE TITANS! (laffs) THEM TITANS WEAR BLUE, TOO, NOT NO FUNERAL PURPLE LIKE LAY-MAR THE HAS BEEN! (laffs) CARDINAL FANS IS SAD CUZ THEY CAINT KEEP TAWKIN ABOUT LAY-MAR! NOW EVERYBODY KNOWS HE WAS A FRAUD! (laffs)

Notre Dame can’t seem to put away Louisville, January 11, 2020

AND U OF SMELL BASKETBAW GOT LUCKY AGAINST THEM DRUNK CATHLICK NOTRE DAMERS, SO THAT WAS SAD, BUT THEM CARDINAL CONVICTS CAINT NEVER BEAT U UH KAY, SO THAT’S HAPPY! (laffs) Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs) THEM STOOPID DRUNK, FISHBREATH, ROSARY BEAD RUBBIN CATHLICK NOTRE DAME ROCKHEADS SHOULDA WHOOPED BALDY MACK AND THEM CARDINALS BUT THEY FOLDED AT THE LAST SECOND!

US KENTUCKY FANS WAS PULLIN REAL HARD FOR THEM POPE-LICKIN’ CATHLICK BEER-DRINKIN FOOLS BUT THEY LET LOSERVILLE SNEAK OUTTA THERE WITH A WIN. Y’ALL CATHLICKS GOTTA STOP LIGHTIN CANDLES ALL THE TIME! USE YOUR HANDS TO THROW THEM Ls DOWN! (laffs) Ls DOWN MAKES U OF SMELL PANIC AND THEN THEY LOSE! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs) MEANTIME, COACH CAL AND THE CATS GIVE ALABAMMER A BEATDOWN! (laffs)

ERRBODY AFRAID OF THE CATS! COACH CAL SAYS THERE’S 4 MILLION EXTRA U UH KAY COACHES AND OUR PLAYERS IS FINE-LEE UNNERSTANDIN WHAT THAT MEANS. BRING IT, CAT FANS! (laffs) U OF SMELL FANS AIN’T SMART LIKE GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS! BALDY MACK CALLED THE COPS CUZ ONE U OF SMELL FAN THREATENED TO KILL A CARDINAL PLAYER!

Jordan Nwora, December 2020

THAT AIN’T NOTHIN! US KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS WILL TAKE A U UH KAY PLAYER’S EN-TIRE FAMILY HOSTAGE IF HE DON’T GIT A DOUBLE DOUBLE! (laffs) THAT’S HOW US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS ROLL! (laffs) GO BLUE! GO CATS! BLUE GITS IN! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT! AWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS!

NOW TONIGHT WE ALL GOT TO SET THROUGH A FRAUD FOOTBAW GAME…AIN’T NOBODY IN THEIR RIGHT MIND BLEEVES THIS HERE NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIPS GAME IS LEGIT SINCE KENTUCKY AIN’T ONE OF THE TEAMS PLAYIN. YOU KNOW THAT’S TRUE, LARRY MINNER! KENTUCKY WAS THE BEST FOOTBAW TEAM ALL YEAR!

L.S.U. IS KINDA GOOD BUT THEY OUGHTA BE PLAYIN S.E.C. SUPER-PIRE KENTUCKY WILDCATS FOR THE NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIPS, NOT NO A.C.C. TOY BOWL CHAMP CLEMSON TIGERS WITH A LONG HAIRED, DOPE SMOKIN, HIPPIE FREAK QUARTERBACK LIKE SUNSHINE LAWRENCE! AMERICA’S FAVORITE QUARTERBACK AIN’T SUNSHINE, AIN’T JOE BURNHOLE, AIN’T TOM BRADY…IT’S KENTUCKY WILDCAT LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR!

Lynn Bowden Junior taunts Louisville with Ls down

THE N.F.L. IS GONNA SHOCK THE WORLD THIS WEEK AND GU-NOUNCE THAT THEIR MVP IS LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR WHO AIN’T PLAYED A SNAP YET BUT THEY ALREADY KNOW HE’S THE GREATEST! THAT’S A FACT, YOU BALD HAIRED, U OF SMELL BOOTLICKER! NOW THAT YOUR LITTLE HERO LAY-MAR JACKSON BEEN BUXPOSED AS A FLASH IN THE PAN U OF SMELL FAILURE, THE WHOLE COUNTRY IS WAITIN FOR LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR TO SHOW UP AND SAVE PRO FOOTBAW! IT’S TRUE, DADGUMMIT!

LAY-MAR JACKSON GOT THROWED AROUND LIKE A RAG DOLL – REMEMBER THEM TITANS! REMEMBER THEM TITANS! – AND FORGIT ABOUT LAY-MAR! FORGIT ABOUT LAY-MAR! STICK A FARK IN HIM…HE’S DONE! THE N.F.L.’s GREATEST QUARTERBACK IN HISTORY IS JUST NOW ARRIVIN TO BE BETTER THAN BRADY, BETTER THAN YOUR GAY BOYFRIEND AARON RODGERS, BETTER THAN JOE NAMATH, TERRY BRADSHAW, RUSSELL WILSON, PATRICK MAHOMO, JOHNNY U-NITAS, AND Y.A. TITTLE. LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR IS WALKIN THRU THAT DOOR! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT! GO CATS! GO BLUE! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! US CAT FANS CAINT STOP OBSESSIN ABOUT U OF SMELL! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN!

Jokes are jokes. Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean you’re right.

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What she said. #nailedit

What he said. #nailedit

Gervais’ most poignant moment came when he torched Apple, Amazon, and Disney for their oppressive, skinflint labor practices. Apple CEO Tim Cook was in the audience and could do nothing but take the face punch.

Apple CEO Tim Cook did not appear to enjoy comedian Ricky Gervais torching his company on the Golden Globes telecast.

Jokes are jokes. Just because the butt of the joke doesn’t enjoy it, the truth of the zinger made it a fabulous comedic concept.

Known for being a control freak, Cook had to be humiliated as he sat for the rest of the three hour show with that one Gervais crack spinning wildly in his brain.

The CEOs of Amazon and Disney made a good choice to either avoid attending or staying out of camera range.

Monica Nickelsburg chronicles the unsavory labor issues that Gervais spotlighted to millions of Americans watching on TV.

Rep. John Yarmuth on risk/reward of killing Iranian military leader, slow motion impeachment, and CNN settling with student Nick Sandmann

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Rep. John Yarmuth (KY-3) held nothing back in responding to President Donald Trump’s decision to kill Iranian military leader Qasem Soleimani. Yarmuth is quick to acknowledge that Soleimani was a terrorist but questions the risk because of heightened danger to U.S. military troops around the world.

Rep. Yarmuth and I also talked about Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi’s slow progress on moving impeachment forward. The congressman said there is abundant new evidence since the House impeachment vote to warrant calling witnesses in the upcoming Senate trial.

16-year-old Covington Catholic student Nick Sandmann and Nathan Phillips, January 2019

As for the just announced settlement between CNN and maligned high school student Nick Sandmann, Congressman Yarmuth didn’t want to revisit his peculiar tweet that slammed Sandmann and his Covington Catholic classmates. He pushed the topic aside as irrelevant in the grand scope of things with global upheaval related to Iranian unrest.

Lots of celebrities and media people bullied the Covington high school students following the so-called confrontation. Then came additional video that added context showing that a radical group called Black Hebrew Israelites throwing racist, homophobic slurs at the students and other tourists passing by.

Others have pointed to hypocrisy among media outlets when they’re fawning over liberal teenagers and demonizing conservative teens.

Months ago, Sandmann’s attorneys released a lengthy list of potential lawsuit targets, all thought to have publicly humiliated the 16-year-old before learning the full breadth of the story.

For the record, CNN parted ways with contributor Reza Aslan a few months after the media pundit posted this tweet.

Nick Sandmann still has lawsuits pending against NBC Universal, the Washington Post, and an expected action against Gannett.

In our new radio interview, Rep. Yarmuth alluded to the dangers of jumping in early on Twitter before a complete story is told, but other people responding to student Nick Sandmann’s settlement announcement tweet still haven’t learned.

Ricky Gervais pushes the WOKE army’s buttons again

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Ricky Gervais is a fearless comedian who rips into Hollywood arrogance like no other. His most recent hosting job at the 2020 Golden Globes was close to brilliant in that it upsets just about everyone, a rarity in today’s culture of snowflake sensitivity.

Self-important, politically condescending, private jet flying, hypocritical Hollywood elites had to sit stone faced on a live NBC broadcast and quiver as Gervais scanned the room, methodically lancing the oversized egos of these pampered crybabies.

It was gorgeous.

God Bless the blunt truth telling of Ricky Gervais. That’s a joke, of course, because Ricky Gervais is an avowed atheist. For Hollywood elites, Gervais’s mockery of religion is his only saving grace. (That’s another religion joke, BTW).

Apple Inc. CEO Tim Cook looked like he was prepping for a colonoscopy as Gervais correctly pointed out that the tech company pretends to be WOKE yet operates Chinese sweatshops. How many Apple employees watching at home must have thrown their fists into the air and roared with laughter?

Apple CEO Tim Cook did not appear to enjoy comedian Ricky Gervais torching his company on the Golden Globes telecast.

Gervais reminded the gathered stars that they had no business spewing their political ideology since most of them had attended fewer school classes than media darling climate activist teenager Greta Thunberg, a dropout.

Perhaps Gervais’ sharpest attack was aimed at all of the gathered Hollywood executives, telling the viewers that the assembled bosses are “all terrified of Ronan Farrow. He’s coming for you! Talking of all you perverts…”

Farrow’s book Catch and Kill chronicles dozens of sexual assault claims made against Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein, accused of raping and assaulting over 100 women trying to find acting work.

For all of Gervais’ affected roasting of hypersensitive celebs, some powerfully poignant words came from Saturday Night Live comedian/actor Kate McKinnon. In presenting a major comedy award to Ellen DeGeneres, McKinnon cited her “bravery (in going public about being gay, and) what that has meant to me and how that’s changed my life.”

LGBTQ people have been harassed, bullied, and beaten down since the beginning of time so it is moving when two famous and influential lesbians are able to share words of support in front of millions of TV viewers without it raising a ruckus.

Maybe we are finally growing up in this sexually uptight society. Maybe.

Ellen DeGeneres comes out in TIME, April 1997

Ellen opened the gates for lots of other people to thrive professionally and personally outside of the shadows.

Of course many other Golden Globe celebrities couldn’t resist turning an awards show about great movies and shows into political grandstanding. There was the always predictable ORANGE MAN BAD Trump bashing, clucking about climate change, and a pregnant lady reminding people that she is judge and jury over whether another person lives or dies. How sweet.

Shiny trophy or baby? None of your bees wax. It’s all in mom’s values.

Just don’t call anyone fat or Lizzo will twerk you into submission.

This author gets it right.

The Beasman is feasting on U of Smell’s losing streak while the Cats soar

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THE BEASMAN loserville losing streak
(chuckling) ZIPPITY DO DAH, ZIPPITY DAY. MY OH MY WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY! (laffs) LOSERVILLE GOTTA LONGER LOSIN STREAK THAN I-RANIAN GENERALS HANGIN ROUND AIRPORTS! (laffs) Y’ALL CAN’T EVEN BEAT AN EGG! (laffs) U OF SMELL SUCKS SO BAD THAT CHRIS MACK GOT A JOB OFFER FROM ROOMBA! (laffs) YOU GOTTA LAFF AT MY FUNNY COMEDY JOKES, LARRY MINNER, CUZ AIN’T NOTHIN ELSE FUNNY ON THIS PATHETIC RADIO SHOW. (laffs)

photo by UK Athletics

HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW TOP 25 PO? SOMETHIN BLUE IS ON THE RISE AND SOMETHIN RED IS JUST BOUT DEAD! (laffs) I AIN’T QUIT CHUCKLIN SINCE BALDY MACK AND HIS AIRBALL-BEANOS LIMPED OUTTA RUMP ARENER SAD AND HUMILLER-FIED BY U UH KAY AGIN! (sing) IT’S STILL THE MOST WONNN-DER-FUL TIME, OF THE YEEEEEEAAAAARRRRRR! (laffs) SO LARRY…YOU FINE-LEE COME BACK TO WORK TO FACE THE MUSIC! (laffs)

I BEEN WAITIN EVER DAY TO HEAR YOUR STUPID VOICE BACK ON THE LECTRIC RADIO EVER SINCE COACH CAL PUT A SMACKDOWN ON YOUR PRECIOUS CARDINAL CONVICTS! (laffs) I TURNT ON THE RADIO AND YOU WEREN’T ON SO I THUNK – LARRY MINNER IS SKEERED! (laffs) ADMIT IT, LARRY! YOU WAS TOO DEE-PRESSED TO COME BACK AND FACE US GOOD AND CLASSY WILDCAT FANS! (laffs) MATT JONES OUGHT TO HAVE YOUR TIME SLOT ANYHOO! MATT JONES IS THE BEST BROADCASTIGATOR SINCE CAY-WOOD!

Chris Tomlin, Terry Meiners, and Matt Jones at WHAS studios, January 2, 2020

SO KEEP CRYIN YOUR LITTLE CARDINAL TEARS WHILE US CAT FANS LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL! KENTUCKY FOOTBAW IS #1 IN THE WORLD…ALL 32 NFL TEAMS PARKED A NEW CAR IN LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR’S DRIVEWAY TO WIN HIM OVER. IT LOOKS LIKE A COUNTRY CLUB PARKIN LOT OUT THERE! (laffs) SO ADMIT IT – LYNN BOWIE IS BETTER THAN LAY-MAR JACKSON! IT’S TRUE, YOU ROCKHEAD U OF SMELL BOOTLICKER! LAY-MAR IS OVER! THE WORLD LOVES LYNN BOWIE NOW CUZ HE’S BIG BLUE!

Lynn Bowden Jr promised “Ls down forever.”

THE BELK BOWL IS NOW BIGGER THAN THE NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIPS GAME CUZ EVERBODY KNOWS L.S.U. AND CLEMSON IS REALLY JUST PLAYIN FOR SECOND. STOOPS TROOPS KENTUCKY WILDCATS IS BETTER THAN YOUR GREEN GAY BUTT PACKERS, LARRY! (laffs)

COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – COACH CAL SAYS U UH KAY BASKETBAW WILL BE BACK AT #1 BY NEXT WEEK CUZ HE’LL GIT THE POPE TO SLAP ALL THE VOTERS! (laffs) U UH KAY AIN’T GONNA LOSE NO MORE GAMES! EVEN IF ASHTON HAGANS GOTTA GIT HIS BAD LEG CUT OFF, COACH CAL SAYS HE’S BETTER THAN ANYBODY ON LOSERVILLE’S TEAM. (laffs)

LOSERVILLE HAS THE LONGEST LOSING STREAK IN AMERICA RIGHT NOW SO Y’ALL CAN CROW ABOUT THAT! (laffs) U UH KAY IS PERFECT IN S.E.C. PLAY, TOO. LET’S SEE, HOW IS U OF SMELL DOIN IN THE A.C.C.? OH YEAH…Y’ALL JUST LOST TO A FARMER KENTUCKY COACH NAME OF LENNER HAMILTON. HE USED TO WORK FOR ME, LARRY, AND HE COME VISIT ME ON FRIDEE NIGHT LOOKIN FOR AD-VICE ON HOW TO WHOOP LOSERVILLE.

Joe B Hall and Leonard Hamilton, January 3, 2020

I SAYS TO HIM, I SAYS “LENNER. JUST PLAY A DEE-FENSE CUZ LOSERVILLE SHOOTS LIKE STEVIE WONDER! (laffs) ALL Y’ALL FLORIDA STATERS GOTTA DO IS SCORE ONE BUCKET CUZ LOSERVILLE THROWIN UP MORE BRICKS THAN HABITAT FOR HUMANA!” (laffs) WHAT A FUN TIME TO BE A KENTUCKY WILDCAT! STOOPS TROOPS IS THE GREATEST FOOTBAW TEAM IN THE WORLD, COACH CAL IS PACKIN HIS BAGS FOR THE FINAL FOUR AGAIN, AND LOSERVILLE IS LOWER THAN A SNAKE’S BELLY IN A SINKHOLE. (laffs)

HAPPY BLUE YEAR, CAT FANS! THESE ARE THE GOOD OLD DAYS! I ALSO TODE LENNER HAMILTON TO SEE ABOUT COACHIN EVANSVILLE TOO SO THEY CAN FIRE WALTER McCARTHY THE TRAITOR TURNCOAT! AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT! GO BIG BLUE! GO BIG BLUE! HAPPY BLUE YEAR, YOU BUNCH OF SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, GOLD TEEF, WELFARE STAMP, TARC BUS RIDIN, DRIVE BY SHOOTIN, G.E.D. FLUNKIN U OF SMELL FOOLS! THIS HERE IS WILDCAT COUNTRY! GO BIG BLUE! HAPPY BLUE YEAR! COME SEE ABOUT IT!