THE BEASMAN cat fan uprising
I KNOW THERE’S A LOT OF CRABBY CAT FANS RIGHT NOW BUT TELL ‘EM TO PUT COACH CAL’S FURNITURE BACK IN HIS HOUSE! COACH CAL DON’T GOTTA LEAVE LEXINUN AFTER ALL CUZ U UH KAY IS WINNIN AGAIN!

AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! DONTRAY ALLEN IS SHOOTIN THE LIGHTS OUT AND WE GOT KREON BROOKS PLAYIN AGAIN! BIG BLUE NATION OUGHT TO BE HAPPY BUT HALF OUR GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS SAY THEY AIN’T FANS NO MORE!

Laurel County Sheriff and Jailer burn their UK shirts in protest of UK kneeling last game pic.twitter.com/fyy71mnSJZ

— Matt Jones (@KySportsRadio) January 11, 2021

LARRY, WHY CAINT YOU TAWK ABOUT KENTUCKY’S FAN UPRISING INSTEAD OF ALL THIS DUMB WARSHINUN STUFF? COME ON, LARRY MINNER! MATT JONES STICKS TO SPARTS AND SO SHOULD YOU! BUT SHUT YOUR SNAGGLE TOOTH, LOSERVILLE BUTTKISSIN MOUTH ABOUT LAYMAR JACKSON FINE-LEE WINNIN A PLAYOFF GAME! LAYMAR SUCKS! HE AIN’T NO TIM COUCH, I TELL YOU WHAT! LAYMAR JACKSON JUST GOT LUCKY CUZ THAT TENNERSEE FELLER WITH THE PONYTAIL WAS TURRIBLE.

PUT SOME RESPECT ON HIS NAME

Tune in: https://t.co/X3pPHm4VP4 pic.twitter.com/m5o2uSVpvt

— Baltimore Ravens (@Ravens) January 10, 2021

I HEARED ALL THEM NASHVILLE PLAYERS WAS JUST SCARED CUZ LAYMAR PARKED A R.V. ON THE SIDELINES WITH A VOICEBOX SAYIN “WARNING: THE RAVENS WILL BE THROWIN BOMBS!” (laffs) COME ON, LARRY, LAUGH AT MY FUNNY COMEDY JOKES! AIN’T NOBODY GOT HURT! IF TENNERSEE FANS WOULDA STARMED THE RAVENS HO-TEL LIKE TRUMP FANS STORMIN THE CAPITOL THEN THEY COULDA SHOOK EM UP A LITTLE! (laffs) YOUR LOSERVILLE HERO LAYMAR THROWED A PICK AND TIM COUCH WOULDN’T UH DONE THAT!

AND LAYMAR DINT REALLY SCORE ON THAT LONG RUN; THEM CROSS-EYED REFFERMARIES JUST GIVE IT TO HIM CUZ THEY’S PROLLY BETTIN ON BALTIMORE. SO HAVE YOUR FUN NOW BUT LAYMAR GONNA GIT THUMPED NEXT WEEK. THEN YOU U OF SMELL FANS WILL HAVE TO GO BACK TO TAWKIN ABOUT JOHNNY UNITAS. (laffs) THE GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCATS IS ALL OVER THE NFL! WE GOT BUDDY SNELL, DANNY TREVACIOUS, ZA-DRANO SMIFF, MIKE SMIFF, AVERY SMIFF, AND LEROY COHEN, THE NEW KENTUCKY FOOTBAW OFFENSER COORDINATION!

Good luck to our #NFLCats this #SuperWildcard Weekend.

Watch the #NFLPlayoffs on CBS, Fox, NBC and ESPN pic.twitter.com/HhtXs6UuZI

— Kentucky Football (@UKFootball) January 9, 2021

FORE HE COMES TO LEXINUN, HE’S GONNA TAKE HIS L.A. RAMS UP TO THE FROZEN TUNDRA TO BEAT YOUR GREEN GAY BUTT PACKERS! (laffs) I LOVE IT! DOWN GOES JANE ALEXANDER! AND DOWN GOES AARON RODGERS! DOWN GOES RODGERS! SPEAKING OF SWISHY BOYS, I HEARED YOUR SAINT X BOYFRIEND JUSTIN THOMAS CALL OUT TO YOU ON NATIONAL TV OVER THE WEEKEND! (laffs) HE MISSED A PUTT AND THEN HE SAID…WELL…HE DINT SAY YOUR ACTUAL NAME BUT HE SAID YOUR NICKNAME! (laffs) THAT’S WHY YOU SAINT X BOYS DON’T WANT NO GIRLS AROUND YOUR LITTLE HIGH SCHOOL, RIGHT? (laffs)

AND I KNOW Y’ALL IS HAPPY THAT BEAR BRYANT BEATTY FINALLY QUIT AT TRINITY HIGH SCHOOL BUT WHOEVER THEY GIT TO REPLACE HIM WILL KEEP ON BEATIN YOU SWISHY BOYS ON PAPA LEVEL ROAD! (laffs) Y’ALL MIGHT AS WELL KEEP BRAGGIN ABOUT YOUR LITTLE SWIMMIN CHAMPERCHIPS CUZ Y’ALL AIN’T NEVER GONNA BEAT TRINITY FOOTBAW AGAIN! I LOVE IT! AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS!

LARRY, I BEEN ON THE PHONE ALL DAY TAWKIN TO OTHER WILDCAT FANS WHO IS ALL TORE UP ABOUT COACH CAL’S KENTUCKY WILDCATS TAKIN A KNEE AT SAIRDEE’S GAME. AT FIRST I THUNK THEY WAS ALL DOWN THERE LOOKIN FOR CALIPARI’S CONTACT LENS BUT THEN I FIGGERED THEY WAS SHOWIN CONDOLENCES RIGHT BEFORE THEY KILT THE FLORIDA GATORS! (laffs) THAT’S ALL IT WAS…THEY WAS KNEELIN IN PRAYER LIKE YOU DO AT ANYBODY’S FUNERAL. I HOPE THE CATS KEEP ON KNEELIN AT EVER GAME SO THE OPPONENT KNOWS THEY ABOUT TO DIE! (laffs)

I’m so proud of @dontaieallen11 and his growth as a basketball player. This should be applauded as much as anything he’s doing! pic.twitter.com/2iZ5vqCZZo

— John Calipari (@UKCoachCalipari) January 11, 2021

Y’ALL BIG BLUE NATION NEED TO CHILL OUT AND CELLERMABRATE THE FACT THAT KENTUCKY DON’T SUCK NO MORE! WE IS ON A BIGTIME WINNIN STREAK AND THE WHOLE WORLD IS NOTICIN! LET’S GO CATS! KEEP IT ROLLIN! KEEP RUNNIN OVER EVERBODY LIKE TRUMP FANS BUSTIN INTO NANCY PELOSER’S OFFICE TO HANG A WILDCAT POSTER! LET’S GO CATS! BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! BUT DON’T TEAR GAS US! WE POSED TO GIT IN CUZ WE BOUGHT SCALPER TICKETS SO YOU KNOW THEY’S LEGIT!