THE BEASMAN hate week AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! (long laff) IT’S HATE WEEK, CAT FANS, AND US GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS HATE ONE TEAM MORE THAN ANY OTHER TEAM…THEM STINKY, NECK TATTOO, DOPE SMOKIN, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, STRIPPER POLE LOVIN, LYIN, CHEATIN, PLAYBOOK STEALING LOSERVILLE CARDINAL CONVICTS! (laffs) Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs) THE WHOLE STATE HATES LOSERVILLE! WE HATE YOUR SCHOOL, YOUR CRIME, YOUR TRASH, AND YOUR MAMAS! (laffs) Y’ALLS CRIME INFESTED TOWN IS AN EMBARRASSMENT TO BLUEGRASS COUNTRY! GOVERNOR BESHEAR, A WILDCAT FAN, TRIED TO SELL Y’ALL TO INJIANNER! (laffs) INJIANNER SAID “NO THANKS. WE’D RATHER TAKE CHICAGO CUZ THEY GOT LESS KILLINGS!” (laffs) TO GIT RID OF MURDER CITY, JUST DIG THE
THE BEASMAN uk wins the world CATS WIN! BLUE GITS IN! CATS WIN! BLUE GITS IN! (laffs) ALL WE DO IS WIN, WIN, WIN! ALL WE DO IS WIN! WIN! WINNNNNN! (laffs) SNELL YEAH! SNELL YEAH! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs) LARRY MINNER AND ALL HIS SNAGGLE TOOTH CARDINAL CONVICT FANS AIN’T GOT NO REASON TO LIVE NO MORE! (laffs) WHY DON’T Y’ALL SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, NECK TATTOO, WELFARE STAMP CASHIN, GRAFFITI PAINTIN, GANG BANG THUG LOSERVILLE FANS JUST BOW DOWN AND ADMIT THAT U UH KAY IS YOUR MASTER! DO IT, LARRY! SAY THAT U UH KAY IS YOUR BIG BROTHER DOMMERATOR RIGHT NOW OR YOU IS A BROADCAST FRAUD! (laffs) IF YOUR CAINT ADMIT THAT U UH
THE BEASMAN lipscomb win I SEEN YOUR SOCCER COACH RUN OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, LARRY. WHAT HAPPENED, DID Y’ALL SEND HIM A STRIPPER AS A CHRISTMAS PRESENT BUT HE HAD TOO MANY MORALS TO SMOOCH HER? (laffs) WE DON’T LIKE U UH KAY SOCCER, NEITHER, CUZ IT’S JUST A BUNCH OF STINKBREATH FUR-EN-URZ RUNNIN AROUND A COW PASTURE WITHOUT NOBODY NEVER SCORIN, JUST LIKE YOUR HIGH SCHOOL DATING LIFE, RIGHT LARRY? (laffs) POOR POOR LARRY. HIS PRECIOUS CARDINALS IS ALL WARSHED UP AND HIS BOYFRIEND SLICK RICK DONE FALLED IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER BALD GUY NAME OF DICK VITALIS. (laffs) IT’S JUST A SCUMBAG SCHOOL, PEOPLE. U OF SMELL IS SO GROSS
THE BEASMAN #1 (long laffs) LARRY? (laffs) DID YOU GIT (laffs) DID YOU GIT THE NUMBER OFF THAT WILDCAT THAT RUNNED Y’ALL DOWN? (long laffs) I CAINT BLEEVE U OF SMELL IS STILL IN BIDNIZ. USUALLY WHEN SOMEBODY SUFFERS A TRAGEDY LIKE THAT, THE NATIONAL GUARD AND THE RED CROSS COME IN TO CHECK FOR SURVIVORS. (laffs) DID THEY DEE-CLARE LOSERVILLE A DISASTER AREA OR A LOST CAUSE? (laffs) LITTLE BOY PADGETT GOT WHOOPED SO BAD HIS PARENTS GOT ARRESTED. (gaffs) WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS YOU CARDINAL FRAUDS GONNA CHEER FOR NOW? EVEN THE N.I.T. DON’T WANT YOU! (laffs) I HEAR TELL Y’ALL CHANGING THE SCHOOL COLORS FROM RED & BLACK TO ALL-BLACK.
It was close for the first twelve minutes of the Kentucky vs. Louisville rivalry game. Tie score. Both teams missing too many shots. Then UK went on a tear in the second half, opening a 32 point lead. The final score was 90-61. All Wildcats all the time. No Pitino playing the villain role. With more NCAA punishment coming soon and no permanent school president, head basketball coach, or athletics director, how in the world will Louisville compete against top programs in the next five years? QB & JYB - @KyLaborSec Derrick Ramsey and Gov. John Y Brown Jr were elated with @KentuckyMBB blowout of @LouisvilleMBB Me? Nope.Now I worry about the next few years of competition
radio sketch, Tuesday, December 19, 2017 THE BEASMAN wisdom teeth drugs (laffs) HEY LARRY! I JUST WATCHED THAT VIDEO OF THE GIRL WHO’S ALL HIGH AFTER GITTIN HER WISDOM TOOTHS TOOK OUT. SHE STARTS CRYING WHEN HER MAMA TELLS HER SHE GOES TO U OF SMELL AND SO SHE SAYS “GO CATS…Ls DOWN!” (laffs) SHE IS ASHAMED SHE HAD TO GO TO U OF SMELL FOR GRADUMAGATE SCHOOL. (laffs) THAT MADE ME LAFF REAL HARD, LARRY. when I found out I go to Louisville after getting my wisdom teeth out ?? pic.twitter.com/kcxdOGsiDV— Haley Tye (@_haykathryn) December 15, 2017 EVEN WITHOUT HER WISDOM TEEF, SHE IS SOMEONE STILL VERY WISE. (laffs) IT JUST
Lamarvelous was brilliant versus Kentucky in the regular season finale. This early scuffle occurred when UK linebacker Jordan Jones, who was not involved in the tackling of Lamar Jackson, decided to step in and ram his helmet into Louisville's quarterback. Jackson shoved Jones. Jones shoved Jackson. UK fans cried that they BOTH should have been ejected. Watch the video without your blue glasses. When an anger management candidate like Jones walks into a space where he does not belong and initiates contact, expect that contact to be answered. I'm glad neither player was ejected. Louisville benefitted from two subsequent personal foul penalties committed by Jones. Thanks, Jordan! We had fun! Lol My boy Lt ? https://t.co/kMxJZE2H5P— Lamar
The Beasman air date: 10.31.17 BOOOOOOO! BOOOOOO! GLOOOOOOOM & DOOOOOOOM IS ALL AROUND LOSERVILLE, THE LITTLE BROTHER WHO FEARS BIG BOO NATION! (laffs) Y’ALL DON’T NEED NO HAUNTED HOUSE CUZ U OF SMELL IS LIVIN IN IT EVER DAY! ALL THEM SKEERED FACES ON EVER CARNER AS THEY WAIT THE NC2A GRIMMMMMMM REAPER. GRIM REAPER DONE COME FOR SLICK RICK AND TOMMY TURTLENECK AND NOW HE’S A-COMIN FOR THAT FAKE NEWS CHAMPERCHIP BANNER! TAKE IT DOWN! TAKE IT DOWN! (laffs) THIS HERE IS A SAD HALLER-WEEN FOR YOU, AINT IT LARRY? MEMBER THAT CHARLIE BROWN TV CARTOON WHERE HE GOES TRICK-OR-TREATIN AND EVER TIME HE LOOKS IN HIS BAG HE SAYS “I GOT A ROCK.”
For University of Louisville fans and the city that benefits from its revenue and research, today's announcement of an FBI sting involving coaches and multiple recruits was as tough as it gets. UK superman The Beasman didn't miss an opportunity to revel in schadenfreude. The wide ranging probe could involve many more schools. Let's just see where all the overpriced shoes drop.
AWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! GO BIG BLUE! WE IS #1 IN FOOTBAW. COACH CAL IS #1 IN HURRICANE FUNDRAISIN. AND U OF SMELL STILL SUCKS LIKE LAST YEAR! BIG BLUE NATION RULES THE WORLD! HEY LAREEEEEEEEE! LARRY DADGUM MINNER! YOUR CARDINAL BIRDS LOOKED LIKE THEY STILL GOT THE FUMBLE-ITIS THEY HAD LASS YEAR WHEN U UH KAY BEAT ‘EM AND TURNT EM INTO NOBODIES. WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH THEM CARDINAL CONVICTS, LARRY? DO THEY THINK THAT FOOTBAW IS A SUBPOENA OR A HAND GRENADE? AIN’T NONE OF ‘EM WANTS TO HODE ONTO IT. LAY-MAR JACKSON WAS OK BUT THE REST OF EM SUCKED. I TELL YOU WHAT, ALL US GOOD AND