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Cardinals win at Duke, Cat fans unmoved, Beasman praying for March Madness rematch with U of L

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Fresh Kimble and Malik Williams celebrate Louisville’s victory at Duke, January 18, 2020

THE BEASMAN Louisville beats duke
SHUT YOUR STUPID MOUTH ABOUT EVERBODY LOVES SEEIN’ LOSERVILLE BEATIN’ DUKE. I’M PART OF EVERBODY AND I DON’T LIKE IT ONE BIT, DADGUMMIT! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! IF BOTH TEAM BUSSES FOR DUKE AND LOSERVILLE WENT OVER A CLIFF, KENTUCKY FANS WOULD REJOICE BY BURNIN’ COUCHES! Ls DOWN AND DUKIES DOWN!

Y’ALL BOTH DEVILS WHO OUGHTA BE BURNT AT THE STAKE LIKE MY GRANNY’S COUCH! THE ONLY TIME ME AND ALL MY WILDCAT BUDDIES CELLER-MABRATE IS WHEN OUR SAINTLY KENTUCKY WILDCATS BEAT DUKE! TRUE BLUE KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS GIT SICK TO THEIR STOMACHS WHENEVER LOSERVILLE GITS GOOD NEWS. U UH KAY FANS ONLY CARE ABOUT U UH KAY! GO CATS! GO BLUE! COME SEE ABOUT IT!

I KNOW YOUR LITTLE BALD HEAD IS ALL SWOLE UP CUZ U OF SMELL JUMPED KENTUCKY IN THE PO. THAT’S ONLY CUZ THEM ROTTEN CARDINALS WON THREE ROAD GAMES IN A ROW AND ONE OF ‘EM WAS DUKE. BIG WHOOPTY DO. COACH K SAID Y’ALL WAS BULLIES AND THUGS AND FOR ONCE I AGREE WITH THAT RAT FACED DUKE COACH.

UofL freshman David Johnson, a Trinity High School phenom, dominated Duke the entire game.

SO GO AHEAD AND ACT LIKE Y’ALL IS GOODER THAN U UH KAY. WHO WON WHEN WE PLAYED EACH OTHER? YOU KNOW THE CATS DOMMERATED YOU LITTLE BROTHER NOBODIES, YOU CROSS-EYED, SNAGGLE TOOTH, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, NECK TATTOO, WHISKEY FOR BREAKFAST, MAKIN BABIES OUT OF WEDLOCK, G.E.D. FLUNKIN U OF SMELL BOOTLICKER. U UH KAY WHOOPED YOU GOOD, DADGUMMIT, SO SUCK ON THAT TIL WE GIT YOU AGAIN IN MARCH MADNESS! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs)

THE A.C.C. AIN’T AS TOUGH AS THE S.E.C. AND YOU KNOW IT, YOU BALD HAIRED, TWO-FACED, TRAITOR TURNCOAT WENT-TO-U-UH-KAY-BUT-CHEERS-FOR-U-OF-SMELL BENERDICK ARNOLD! YOU SUCK LARRY MINNER! THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS IS STILL GONNA WIN IT ALL CUZ WE IS THE BIG BLUE!

John Calipari ejected at Arkansas, January 18, 2020 (photo: Herald Leader)

COACH CAL GOT THROWED OUTTA THAT ARKANSAS GAME CUZ HE KNOWED HIS WILDCATS WOULD RALLY TO WIN! PLUS, CAL SAYS THERE IS 4 MILLION COACHES IN KENTUCKY WHO CAN PICK UP THE SLACK WHEN HE’S GONE. (laffs)

KINNY PAYNE AIN’T NO REAL COACH, HE’S JUST A FIGGERHEAD LIKE PURDY HAIR ROBIC AND THAT OTHER ASS-SISTANT COACH WHAT’S HIS FACE. WHEN COACH CAL GITS THROWED OUT, ALL US BIG BLUE COACHES IN THE STANDS SHOUT OUT DI-RECTIONS TO OUR GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCAT PLAYERS.

WE HOLLER STUFF LIKE “SCORE MORE POINTS, DADGUMMIT!” AND WE HOLLER “GUARD SOMEBODY, YOU DOOFUS!” SO IT DON’T TAKE NO EINSTEIN TO FIGGER THAT OUT BUT US 4 MILLION EXTRA U UH KAY COACHES JUST WANNA HELP!

KINNY PAYNE AND THEM OTHER RUM DUMMIES MIGHT AS WELL EAT POPCORN AND LET US BIG BLUE FANS IN THE STANDS LEAD US TO VICTREE LIKE WE DONE IN ARKANSAS! (laffs) I LOVE IT! SO HAVE YOUR LITTLE MOMENT IN THE SUN THINKIN Y’ALL U OF SMELL CARDINALS IS GOODER THAN YOU IS! IT WILL JUST MAKE YOUR TEARS MORE DELICIOUS WHEN THE GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCATS SMACK YOU IN THE MOUTH AND SEND YOU HOME FROM MARCH MADNESS AGAIN! (laffs)

(if San Francisco wins vs Green Bay)
OH, AND I’M GLAD YOUR GREEN GAY BUTT PACKERS AIN’T GOIN TO NO SUPER BO SO WE DON’T GOTTA LISTEN TO YOUR STUPID LOUDMOUTH LARRY CHEESEHEAD BRAGGIN’ FOR TWO WEEKS! YOUR PACKERS IS LACKERS JUST LIKE YOUR LOSERVILLE FRAUDS. SO NOW YOU CAN GO TRAITOR TURNCOAT ON YOUR PACKERS BY CHEERING FOR YOUR SAN FRANCISSY-CO FARTY MINNERS! COME ON OUT OF THE CLOSET AND ADMIT THAT SAN FRANCISSY-CO IS WHO YOU REALLY IDEN-TER-FY WITH, YOU SPINELESS FRAUD! GO CATS! GO BLUE! AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR, WE ALREADY KNOW WHO GONNA WIN THE NEXT 10 SUPER BOWLS…THE TEAM THAT’S GOT LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR AS THEIR QUARTERBACK! GO CATS! GO BIG BLUE! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT!

(if Green Bay wins vs San Francisco)
I’M GONNA THROW MY RADIO IN THE GARBAGE CUZ AIN’T NO WAY I CAN LISTEN TO YOU KEEP TAWKIN BOUT U OF SMELL BEATIN DUKE PLUS NONSTOP CHEESEHEAD GREEN GAY BUTT PACKERS SUPER BO HYPE. TOO MUCH LOUDMOUTH LARRY AND NOT ENOUGH GO BIG BLUE FOR ME! I’LL JUST LISSEN TO THE MATT JONES PODCAST OVER AND OVER AND OVER TIL MY EARS BLEED. LEAST THEY’LL BLEED KENTUCKY BLUE! GO CATS! GO BLUE! AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR, WE ALREADY KNOW WHO GONNA WIN THE NEXT 10 SUPER BOWLS…THE TEAM THAT’S GOT LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR AS THEIR QUARTERBACK! GO CATS! GO BIG BLUE! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT!

#1 Cardinals validate their ranking with win over Michigan, The Beasman is getting skeered

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THE BEASMAN cards win as #1
LARRY! LARRY! LARRY! I BEEN WANTIN’ TO VOMIT ALL DAY HAVIN’ TO HEAR ABOUT THEM NO COUNT, TWO BIT, WILDCAT WANNABE, PHONEY #1 U OF SMELL CARDINAL BIRDS WHOOPIN’ MICH-ER-GAN! I SPENT ALL DAY YESTERDEE PRAYIN TO GOD, JESUS, ADOLPH RUPP, THE ELF ON THE SHELF, AND HOLY MACARONI THAT MICH-ER-GAN WOULD COME INTO THAT NASTY CHICKEN BUCKET AREN-ER AND KICK THE CARDINALS IN THEIR STOOPID FACES BUT…NAWWW.

Vince Tyra, Chris Mack, Terry Meiners (December 3, 2019)

NOW WE GOT TO LISSEN ALL WEEK TO ALL THAT IGNERT CHIRPIN BOUT HOW LOSERVILLE IS SO GREAT AND HOW THEY DOMMERATED EVERBODY AND THEY AIN’T LOST TO NO EVANSVILLE AND ALL THAT OTHER NONSENSE. POPPYCOCK! U OF SMELL BETTER ENJOY THEIR FAKE NEWS RANKIN WHILE THEY CAN! I KNOW Y’ALL IS STUPID BUT CHECK YOUR CALENDAR!

THEM CARDINAL CONVICTS IS ON DEATH ROW CUZ THE CATS IS WAITIN FOR YA! YEAH! WE JUST ABOUT 3 WEEKS AWAY FROM THE MIGHTY KENTUCKY WILDCATS STOMPIN CARDINAL FEATHERS JUST LIKE STOOPS TROOPS JUST DONE! DON’T ACT LIKE THAT FOOTBAW GAME DINT HAPPEN!

Lynn Bowden Junior taunts Louisville with Ls down

WE BURNT UP LOTS OF COUCHES BUT THEN LAST NIGHT GOT HERE AND THE JOY IS GONE IN LEXINUN. U OF SMELL HIGHLIGHTS IS ON ALL THE TVs AND IT’S HARRIBLE. NOW ALL US CAT FANS CAINT ENJOY CHRISTMAS CUZ WE GOTTA WORRY ABOUT DEE-CEMBER 28. I TODE THE OLD LADY TO TAKE DOWN ALL THE CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS AND THROW THE TREE IN A DUMPSTER. WE AIN’T CELLER-MA-BRATIN NO BIRTH OF JESUS UNTIL US CAT FANS KNOW FOR SURE THAT THE CATS GONNA BEAT THEM SNAGGLE TOOTH CARDINALS!

WE ALMOST FIRED COACH CAL AFTER HE LOST TO NOBODY EVANSVILLE AND THEM UTAH VALLEY NOBODIES ALMOST BEAT US TOO. BUT THAT’S ALL DAM OVER THE WATER! COACH CAL DONE BEEN TODE BY US GOOD AND CLASSY WILDCATS THAT IF HE DON’T BEAT LOSERVILLE, WE GONNA CHASE HIM OUTTA LEXINUN THAT NIGHT WITH PITCHFARKS AND FIRE! WE AIN’T KIDDIN! HAVIN’ TO LIVE WITH U OF SMELL #1 IS TOO PAINFUL FOR BIG BLUE NATION! WE’D RATHER SEE DUKE WIN IT ALL THAN HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT U OF SMELL BEATIN THE CATS!

Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! AND IF LOSERVILLE BEATS U UH KAY IN RUMP ARENER THEN Ls DOWN MEANS WE GONNA JUMP Y’ALL IN THE PARKIN LOT! DON’T YOU BE FLASHIN NO Ls UP SIGN AT A GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FAN OR WE’LL PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE! WE GONNA KNOCK THEM Ls DOWN AND SPRAY PAINT YOUR UGLY RED SWEATERS BLUE RIGHT THERE IN RUMP ARENER! WE AIN’T PLAYIN, LARRY!

COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – HE BETTER GIT OFF HIS CATHOLIC PRAYIN KNEES AND START TOOTIN THAT WHISTLE IN PRACTICE 24/7 SO THE CATS IS READY FOR THEM ROTTEN CARDINALS. DON’T WORRY ABOUT PRACTICIN FOR THESE RUM DUMMIES WE GONNA PLAY NEXT. FOCUS ON BEATIN LOSERVILLE! WE IS THE CATS!

Louisville coach Chris Mack looks back at his family after his #1 Cardinals dispatched #4 Michigan.

WE POSED TO BE #1 DADGUMMIT! GIT THE CATS READY FOR LOSERVILLE SO WE CAN TAKE THEIR FAKE NEWS #1 RANK AND THROW IT IN THE DUMPSTER WITH THEIR REJECTED NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIP BANNER!

Luke Hancock and Darrell Griffith at the unveiling of their Final Four most outstanding player achievements banner. Pervis Ellison could not attend.

DICK VITALE WAS ON TV LAST NIGHT BLABBERMOUTHIN ABOUT U OF SMELL’s NEW FAKE BANNER! WHO CARES! THAT’S LIKE AN EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH PLAQUE…IT AIN’T NO CHAMPERCHIP…AND U UH KAY GOT 8 REAL ONES! WAKE UP, COACH CAL OR WE GONNA FIND SOMEBODY WHO CAN RECRUIT ALL THE ONE-AND-DONES AND ACTUALLY WIN THE DADGUM CHAMPERCHIP FOR A CHANGE! “OH, THEY’RE JUST KIDS” COACH CAL ALWAYS SAYS!

WELL BALDY CHRIS MACK GOT KIDS TOO BUT THEY GOT THE #1 RANK AND THEY IS LAUGHIN AT U UH KAY IN THE REAR VIEW! POOTY OR GIT OFF THE POT, COACH CAL! YOU GOT THREE WEEKS TO SAVE YOUR JOB! I SUGGEST YOU STOP SPENDING ALL DAY AT DUNKIN DONUTS AND START TEACHING THE BIG BLUE HOW TO DUNK! BEAT THEM CARDINALS OR (sing) “I’LL HAVE A BLUE, BLUE CHRISTMAS…WITHOUT YOU…CUZ YOU GOIN TO THE UNEMPLOYMENT LINE.”

ONE AND NONE — The Beasman hopes the U of Smellers die two painful deaths this holiday weekend

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THE BEASMAN two Cardinal deaths
LARRY, LARRY, LARRY! (laffs) I HOPE SANTA CLAUS BRINGS YOU SOME BRAINS THIS YEAR! (laffs) EVERTHANG YOU SAY IS WRONG AND STUPID! (laffs) SHUT YOUR CAKEHOLE TAWKIN ABOUT U UH KAY NOT LIKIN DUKE LOSIN’ LAST NIGHT! ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS LOVE WHEN DUKE LOSES, EVEN IF IT MEANS GOOD STUFF FOR LOSERVILLE. BIG BLUE NATION’S MOTTO IS: “DUKE IN PAIN IS U UH KAY’S GAIN!” (laffs)

POOR LITTLE DUKIES…CRYIN THEIR LITTLE DUKIE TEARS ON THEIR FANCY DUKIE CLOTHES AND ALL OVER THEIR FANCY DUKIE CARS. OH BOO HOO HOO! THEY GOT WHOOPED BY STEPHEN A SMIFF! (laffs) AIN’T NOBODY TAWKIN ABOUT U UH KAY LOSIN TO EVANSVILLE NO MORE CUZ DUKE GITTIN ALL THE SMACK TAWK NOW! (laffs) OF COURSE, ALL YOU SNAGGLE TOOTH, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, MAKING BABIES OUT OF WEDLOCK, GOD HATIN, BRAINLESS, SPINELESS, GUTLESS CARDINAL REDNECKS IS ALL JACKED UP ABOUT DUKE LOSIN CUZ YOU THINK THAT MAKES YOU #1 BUT YOU IS WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! (laffs)

SEE, YOU AIN’T NEVER GONNA GIT A SNIFF OF THAT #1 RANKIN CUZ THEM GOOD OL WESTERN KENTUCKY HILLTOPPERS GONNA BEAT Y’ALL CARDINAL FRAUDS ON BLACK FRIDEE! (laffs) U OF SMELL GONNA GIT A ONE-TWO PUNCH BY REAL KENTUCKY COLLEGES TWO DAYS IN A ROW! (laffs) ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS IS BIIIIIGGGG HILLTOPPER FANS RIGHT NOW! (laffs) GO TOPS! GO HILLTOPPERS! USUALLY WE MAKE FUN OF Y’ALL FOR BEIN A BUNCH OF RED TOWEL WAVIN WILDCAT WANNABES BUT NAWWWW, NOT TODAY!

U UH KAY WILDCAT FANS LOVE THE HILLTOPPERS CUZ Y’ALL GOT THE PIRE TO SNATCH THAT #1 RANKIN AWAY FROM THE CARDINAL CONVICTS WHO ALSO HATE YOU AND THINK YOU IS THEIR LITTLE BROTHER! (laffs) SO GO CRUSH THEM NASTY CARDINAL BEAKS, HILLTOPPERS AND – POOF! – THAT #1 RANKIN GOES UP IN SMOKE! (laffs) I LOVE IT!

THEN ON SAIRDEE, STOOPS TROOPS GONNA SMASH A GARBAGE CAN ALL OVER U OF SMELL AGAIN! KAPOW! KAPOW! U OF SMELL GITS THEIR JAW JACKED TWO DAYS IN A ROW! I LOVVVVVVVVE IT! (laffs) LET’S GO HILLTOPPERS! LET’S GO STOOPS TROOPS! US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS CAN GO DOWN TO NASHVILLE ON FRIDAY TO CHEER FOR THE HILLTOPPERS TO WHOMP ON BALDY MACK’S CARDINAL NOBODIES – OVER-RATED! – OVER-RATED! – AND THEN U UH KAY FANS ROLL UP TO KAY-ROGER FIELD FOR THE DOUBLE TREAT OF SEEIN STOOPS TROOPS BASH THE BRAINS OUT OF LOSERVILLE FOOTBAW AND THEIR DIM WITTED COACH GOMER PYLE! (laffs)

IT’S ALL COMIN TOGETHER, CAT FANS! THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST WEEKEND EVER WITH CARDINAL TEARS FLOWIN LIKE NI-AGGER FALLS! (laffs) BETTER ENJOY YOUR THANKSGIVIN TURKEY MUSH AND PLUM PUDDIN PIE, YOU CARDINAL CONVICTS CUZ YOUR HAPPY DAYS IS OVER! (laffs) AND STOP YOUR FRAUD CAMPAIGN OF PUTTIN UP A FAKE NEWS BANNER OF FINAL FOUR MVPs. REAL BASKETBAW FANS KNOW Y’ALL LOST YOUR STRIPPER POLE CHAMPERCHIP BANNER CUZ YOU LET PROSTER-TUTES RUN FREE IN THE DARM-I-TORY AND SLICK RICK WAS BUYIN REE-CRUITS!

IF U OF SMELL IS GONNA HANG A NEW BANNER TO CELERBRATE THEIR CHEATIN CARDINAL CRIMINALS THEN U UH KAY NEEDS TO HANG A BANNER CELEBRATIN THEIR MISUNDERSTOOD WILDCAT CRIMINAL HEROES LIKE TOM PAYNE, RICHIE FARMER, MICHAEL PORTER, DEANDRE LIGGONS, AND MAYBE A EXTRA TRIBUTE TO TERRENCE JONES FOR BOOT-STOMPIN A HOMELESS GUY! (laffs) ANYTHING U OF SMELL CAN DO, U UH KAY CAN DO BETTER! (laffs) AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! GO HILLTOPPERS…BEAT THAT BALDY MACK TEAM SO THEY CAINT BE #1. AND GO STOOPS TROOPS! BEAT LOSERVILLE FOOTBAW LIKE YOU DONE LAST YEAR! YOU SUCK, CARDINALS!

The Beasman can’t think straight after the Cats lost #1 in one day

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THE BEASMAN cats losing to everybody
(crying) WALTER MCCARTHY IS THE DEVIL! (cry) A FARMER KENTUCKY WILDCAT U-MILLER-FIED AMERICA’S TEAM, THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS WHO USED TO CALL HIM FRIEND! (cry) WE FOUNDLY PROVED WE WAS NUMBER ONE AND THEN WALTER MCCARTHY DONE SNATCHED IT AWAY LIKE A TWO-BIT THIEF IN THE NIGHT! (cry)

I AIN’T BEEN ABLE TO GIT OUTTA BED FOR 3 DAYS, LARRY MINNER. (cry)

I KNOW YOU AND ALL YOUR CARDINAL BUDDIES IS SMIRKIN CUZ THE GOOD AND CLASSY #1 KENTUCKY WILDCATS CAINT BEAT NOBODY NO MORE. (cry) I HATE WALTER MCCARTHY WITH EVER-THANG I GOT! DADGUMMIT, HOW CAN A FARMER WILDCAT STAB COACH CAL IN THE BACK LIKE THIS BY HAVIN THE AUDACERATION TO SCORE MORE POINTS? (cry)

I WANNA TAKE MY SHOTGUN IN RUMP ARENER AND SHOOT HOLES IN WALTER MCCARTHY’S JERSEY HANGIN UP IN THE RAFTERS. AND SLICK RICK’S TOO. HE’S THE RAT WHO POISONED WALTER MCCARTHY TO GO TRAITOR TURNCOAT ON THE CATS! (cry) THIS IS THE WORSTEST WEEK EVER TO BE A KENTUCKY WILDCAT FAN.

ALL THESE SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, NECK TATTOO, WELFARE STAMP, TRAMP STAMP, PRISON CAMP U OF SMELL CARDINAL FANS IS WALKIN ROUND MOCKIN US CAT FANS CUZ WE WAS ONLY #1 FOR A DAY BEFORE NOBODY EVANSVILLE WHOOPED US. (cry)

AND THAT HAPPENED RIGHT AFTER THEM TENNERSEE PRISON ARNGE HILLBILLY ROCKY TOPPERS WHOOPED STOOPS TROOPS AT THE FOOTBAW STADIUM. (cry) WE HAD IT FIRST-AND-GOAL FROM THE TWO YARD LINE BUT COULDN’T STICK IT IN! (cry) WHY’D YOU JUST RUN IT? TRY SOMETHIN ELSE LIKE A STATUE OF LIBERTY PLAY OR THROWIN IT TO A PLAYER DRESSED UP LIKE A CHEERLEADER! STOOPS REAL NAME IS STOOPID, LARRY!

I HOPE HE TAKES THE FLORIDER STATE JOB AND TAKES HIS VOODOO MOJO OUTTA LEXINUN WITH HIM! (cry) LET’S HIRE RANDO COBB TO COME AND COACH THE CATS! RANDO LOVES U UH KAY. STOOPS LOVES MONEY, NOT NO WILDCATS! (cry) I DON’T WANNA GO ON LIVIN IF U OF SMELL GOES TO A BO GAME AND U UH KAY DON’T! U OF SMELL CAINT QUIT LAUGHIN AT U UH KAY CUZ THEY GOT LAY-MAR JACKSON AND TEDDY DIRTYWATER AND ALL U UH KAY GOT IS WARSHED UP TIM COUCH. (cry)

IT’S ALL GONE SIDEWAYS, LARRY MINNER! STOP YOUR SMIRKIN, YOU BALD HAIRED, BENNERDICK ARNOLD! (cry) Y’ALL CARDINAL BIRDS GONNA COME CRASHIN DOWN REAL SOON WHEN BALDY MACK PLAYS A REAL TEAM! COME DEE-CEMBER 28, LET’S SEE HOW MUCH SMIRKIN YOUR CROSSEYED CARDINAL FANS IS DOIN! YEAH! FIRST THING U UH KAY GOTTA DO IS PUT COACH CAL AND STOOPS ON MINIMAL WAGE! THESE RUM DUMMIES IS MAKIN WAY TOO MUCH MONEY FOR BEIN LOSERS! PAY ‘EM BOTH $12 A HOUR AND IF THEY GIT US A NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIP WE CAN GIVE EM THEIR FULL SALARY AT THE END OF THE SEASON.

I MEAN, YOU DON’T PAY A PLUMBER FOR NOT FIXIN THE TAR-LIT, RIGHT? WHY SHOULD WE PAY THESE PHONIES BIG DOLLARS TO HUMILERATE BIG BLUE NATION? (cry) NOW CHRIS BALDY MACK AND LOSERVILLE GONNA JUMP PAST COACH CAL’S CATS IN THE PO AND IT MAKES ME WANNA PUKE! U UH KAY LOSES TO EVANSVILLE AND GITS MOCKED ALL OVER MURICA! U OF SMELL BEATS INJIANA STATE AND ERRBODY ACTS LIKE Y’ALL BEAT DUKE! YOU’LL GIT YOUR BIG BLUE WHOOPIN REAL SOON, YOU BEER BREATH, MARY-JU-WANNA SNIFFIN, RAP MUSIC, BACKWARDS CAP CARDINAL CONVICTS! LET’S GO, BLUE! AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! BUT RIGHT NOW TIL THEY WIN AGAIN THEY IS RATS! RATS! RATS!

Cats fail to Kash but THE STREAK STARTS NOW

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THE BEASMAN cats lose again
I ALMOST WANNA VOMIT WHEN YOU ANSWER THE PHONE! U OF SMELL AIN’T NOTHIN BUT A BUNCH OF DEMONS! ALL Y’ALL SNAGGLE TOOTH, STINKBREATH CARDINAL FANS WAS A-SQAWKIN BOUT KASH DANIEL TWISTIN THAT FLORIDER GUY’S ANKLE BUT I SEEN SOME U OF SMELL THUG ON SAIRDEE TRYIN TO BREAK A LEG ON A FLORIDER STATE GUY. HOW COME Y’ALL AIN’T ALL HOT-HEADED ABOUT THAT, YOU BUNCH OF HIPPER-CRIT LOSERVILLE LOSERS!

IT’S OK WHEN A U OF SMELLER TRIES TO BREAK A GUY’S LEG BUT WHEN GOOD AND CLASSY KASH DANIEL DOES THAT, Y’ALL CARDINAL SUCKUPS WANT TO GIVE HIM THE DEATH PENALTY! FRAUDS! LOSERVILLE LOSERS CAINT WIN SO YOU GOTTA TRY TO HURT THE GOOD AND CLASSY CATS! BY THE BY, Y’ALL LOST TO NOBODY WILLIE TAGGER AND HIS BAD NEWS BEARS FROM FLORIDA STATE! (laffs) DID YOU SEE HOW BIGTIME S.E.C. JARJUH SHOWED THEM NASTY CATHLICKS FROM NOTRE DAME WHO’S BOSS? S.E.C. FOOTBAW…IT JUST MEANS MORE!

A.C.C. AIN’T NOTHIN BUT A BUNCH OF NANCY BOYS SO DON’T EVEN ACT LIKE Y’ALL CARDINAL CONVICTS CAN HANG WITH KENTUCKY. WE STILL GONNA JACK YOUR JAW IN NOVEMBER…BUT DADGUMMIT, THE GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCATS DONE GOT A TWO GAME LOSER STREAK RIGHT NOW! (cry)

THIS WAS POSED TO BE THE YEAR OF THE CATS! BUT COACH STOOPS HAD TO LEAVE KASH DANIEL ON THE BENCH FOR THE FIRST QUARTER AND THAT’S WHEN THEM COWBELL HILLBILLY MISTER-SIPPY STATE BULL DYKES JUMPED ALL OVER US. NOW WE’S TWO AND TWO! (cry)

WE POSED TO BE FORTY AND OH! (cry) DADGUMMIT! WE IS BIG BLUE NATION! KENTUCKY POSED TO BE UP THERE IN THE PO WITH ALABAMMER AND JARJUH BUT NAWWW. WE AIN’T IN NO TOP 25 CUZ U OF SMELL FANS PITCHED A FIT OVER KASH DANIEL SO STOOPS COULDN’T LET HIM PLAY AND WE LOST! Y’ALL SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, GOLD TOOF, MARY-JUH-WANNA VAPIN, WELFARE FRAUD, MAKIN BABIES OUTTA WEDLOCK, NECK TATTOO LOSERVILLE CARDINALS IS JUST JELLY OF KENTUCKY!

ADMIT IT, YOU BALD HAIRED, TRAITOR TURNCOAT, BENNER-DICK ARNOLD! AND SPEAKIN OF TRAITORS, I LOVE IT THAT YOUR GAY BOYFRIEND SLICK RICK DINT GIT ONE RED CENT FROM U OF SMELL CUZ HE’S A CHEATIN, LYIN, STRIPPER PO LOVIN HAS BEEN! (laffs) POOR OL SLICK RICK – NOW HE GITS TO SAY THAT HE RESIGNED WHEN WE ALL KNOW HE GOT FIRED! (laffs)

Terry Meiners with Bob Ley on Outside the Lines, ESPN, October 2017

WHAT A FRAUD! “OH HEY, MISTER GUY LOOKIN FOR A COACH. HIRE ME CUZ I RESIGNED FROM LOSERVILLE. JUST DON’T LOOK UP NOTHIN ON GOOGLE CUZ GOOGLE MIGHT LIE AND SAY I GOT FIRED FOR CHEATIN!” (laffs) WHAT A JOKE! SLICK RICK IS PRETENDIN LIKE NOBODY MEMBERS THE STRIPPERS OR THE RESTRUNT SEX OR THE 5 STAR BRIAN BOWEN WHO JUST DROPPED OUT OF THE SKY! YEAH, SURE! (laffs) AND NOW SLICK RICK STANDS UP ON THE HIGHWAY EXIT WITH A CARDBOARD SIGN THAT SAYS “WILL COACH FOR FOOD!” I LOVE IT! (laffs)

LARRY MINNER AIN’T GONNA STAY IN LOVE WITH NO POOR SLICK RICK SO YOU MUST BE LOOKIN FOR A NEW RICH BOYFRIEND. WHY DON’T YOU WRITE A LOVE LETTER TO THE AMAZON BALD GUY TO BUY BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN? Y’ALL COULD LIVE UP THERE ENJOYIN EACH OTHER’S PACKAGES! (laffs) WHY AIN’T YOU LAFFIN AT MY FUNNY COMEDY JOKES? THIS HERE IS BIGTIME FREE COMEDY I’M GIVIN YOU, LARRY! (laffs)

AWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! STOOPS TROOPS GOT KASH DANIEL BACK THIS WEEK AGAIN SOUTH CARAMALINER SO WE GONNA BE JUST FINE! THE WINNIN STREAK STARTS NOW FOR BIG BLUE NATION! BRING ON ALABAMMER AND THE NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIPS! WE IS KENTUCKY! THE WINNIN STARTS NOW! THE WINNIN STARTS NOW! THE WINNIN STARTS NOW! FARTY AND OH! FARTY AND OH! FARTY AND OH! GO BIG BLUE! GO BIG BLUE!

No, Goodfellas, he’s not.

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via Twitter

No, I’m not taking that photo. But it’s a powerful message from Rick Pitino to leaders at the University of Louisville.

He very well could have captioned the photo, “I’m not going away until you pay.”

Ricky P is back in Louisville for a federal court hearing regarding his $40 million lawsuit over being being fired by the University of Louisville. That’s how much Pitino claims he is owed by the employment contract that was in place at the time of his dismissal.

UofL’s athletics association thinks Pitino deserves nothing more than the millions he has already been paid over 16 years of employment.

Looks like very little progress has been made so many see a protracted trial and appellate process that could take a decade to resolve.

Pitino was fired after a serious of embarrassments involving sex, strippers, and alleged recruiting violations.

I still believe Pitino knew nothing about the stripper scandal and that the recruiting issues were conducted outside his purview by unscrupulous assistants.

The problem for Pitino is the notion of failure to maintain institutional control over the program and its authorities, his assistants.

It will be interesting to see if a jury of working stiffs feel sympathy for Rick or want to punish him for failed leadership which erased 100+ games and a national championship.

If the over/under is $20 million, I’ll take the over. The Goodfellas will be celebrating the night that decision comes down, then again after the appeals court rules, and ultimately the state supreme court rules.

Now if everyone can just live long enough to see it. Or at least party hard tonight to envision that possibility.

Rick Pitino and friends at Jeff Ruby’s, September 9, 2019

Louisville’s got that going for us, which is nice

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A flood of Bill Murray sightings popped onto social media this week. The actor known as being the most chill celebrity in the world spends time in Louisville with his son Luke, a top recruiter and assistant coach for University of Louisville men’s basketball.

Luke and his wife Kara are expecting their second child soon. Murray loves visiting his son’s family, even handing out Halloween candy at their home last October.

This week, Louisville’s head basketball coach Chris Mack hosted an old guy basketball camp complete with competition, film breakdown, celebrity guests like Bill Murray and Jay Bilas, and a championship game.

Nick Coffey, Terry Meiners, Will Clark (September 6, 2019)

Even though I wore a uniform, I played the role of general manager for some of my much younger colleagues like 790KRD morning host Nick Coffey and 840WHAS news anchor Will Clark.

Chris Mack, Terry Meiners, Jay Bilas, Will Clark, Nick Coffey (September 7, 2019)

The seminars were terrific. Game play was fun. The trainers got a workout helping the old guys deal with sore muscles.

All indications are that the days of a scandal weary UofL basketball program are finally fading away. Finally!

Chris Mack and Jay Bilas (September 7, 2019)

Having Jay Bilas visit the freshly joyous Louisville basketball program was terrific but it is Murray who turns heads wherever he goes.

Murray, 68, parties at a slightly slower pace than he did in the 80s, but he still turns up by surprise at wedding receptions, reunions, pubs, and the occasional party where he is actually expected.

Such was the case at Chris and wife Christie Mack’s Prospect area home this week. Coach Mack’s basketball camp brought Murray to both the gym and a casual dinner party.

Murray was incredibly kind to each fan who asked for a photo, including a woman who said “I hate to interrupt your dinner.”

Murray sprang from his seat and replied, “It’s OK, I’ve eaten before.”

She got the photo she wanted.

Murray was especially amused with my wife Mary, teasing her about settling for a guy like me. He slyly turned the conversation into the concept that Mary was so incredibly lucky to land a man of my superior intellect and rugged good looks.

He saw me, looked at Mary, looked back at me, then stared at Mary and said, “How did you land THIS guy?” as if he was looking at the world’s top male model.

Murray and I had already exchanged a few laughs earlier in the day so he knew that I am conditioned to taking a ribbing. He also enjoys the art of changing facial expressions between successive photos. Here are a few examples shot by an observer.

WDRB director of sales Rick Burrice was more than a bit surprised to find Murray hitting golf balls next to his sons on the Audubon Country Club driving range.

via Facebook

With over 40 years working in broadcasting, I’ve been fortunate enough to meet dozens of highly famous people. Most of them are accommodating and offer great show content, but very few seem to savor the company of everyday working people.

Bill Murray seems just as comfortable listening, not talking, but listening to people tell him about their lives. It was impressive to watch him interact with 30 or 40 people at Mack’s house and maybe a hundred others at the basketball gym.

What a chill dude. What a great gift for UofL basketball and the city of Louisville.

And yes, the Caddyshack star did hit the golf course to play 18 with Luke at Valhalla. Once again, Murray patiently posed for photos with golfers and Valhalla staff members.

Bill Murray and Valhalla teammate Charlie Logsdon (September 8, 2019)

As he walked into the clubhouse, I said I’d see him for trick-or-treating next month for Halloween. Murray shot back, “Wait til you see my costume.”

Welcome home, Bill.

Terry Meiners, Bill Murray, Jonathan Blue (September 6, 2019)

SJW suffer selective outrage syndrome

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Virtue signaling social justice warriors have some blind spots. They deface the Castleman statue and demand its removal without grasping the full context of John Castleman‘s story.

But never mind the facts. Hide that horrible monument from the WOKE folks. Their pure hearts have never made mistakes or been in need of longterm enlightenment.

Have the WOKE warriors ever watched clips of Muhammad Ali when he promoted racial segregation? Ali fiercely preached against white and black people dating or daring to make babies.

“Every intelligent person wants his child to look like him. I want to blot out my race and lose my beautiful identity? Who want to spot up yourself and kill your race?”

No one is throwing paint all over the Muhammad Ali Center or on Muhammed Ali Boulevard signs because he used to believe that “Chinese people wanna be with Chinese. Pakistanis want to be with their own kind.”

Our self-appointed Social Justice Warrior city purifiers have missed a few other “evil racists” who are posthumously honored in Louisville. Why haven’t they stomped on the evil, racist, criminal Bingham family, or a newspaperman who wrote of his vile hatred of African Americans?

It’s selective outrage, that’s why. Most Louisvillians have likely traveled hundreds of times on the Watterson Expressway, named for The Courier-Journal’s first editor Henry Watterson. His nickname was Marse, which means “master.” Message!

Here are some facts about Good Ol’ Marse Watterson from a 2018 CJ 150th anniversary retrospective:

Considering Watterson’s horrible sins from 100 years ago that are overlooked by SJW, should we rename I-264 as Hypocrisy Highway?

It sounds as if Henry Watterson would have loved the late Senator Wendell Ford, who famously said the n-word on the WHAS Radio in 1995, a few years after the Binghams sold their media properties.

Sen. Wendell Ford, parttime radio shock jock

No one is defacing signs or buildings where Wendell Ford or Henry Watterson are celebrated. Nor is any social justice warrior demanding that the Bingham name be stricken from any place of prominence.

——–

CLICK: FOR 150 YEARS, THE COURIER-JOURNAL HAS FOUGHT FOR JUSTICE AND FAIRNESS

Mary and Barry Bingham Sr. via The Courier-Journal

Hmmm. Another heaping helping of SJW blind spotting? Let’s meet several generations of the heralded Bingham family of Louisville.

CLICK: BINGHAM BOOK EXCERT IN VANITY FAIR

From the book “The Patriarch, the Rise of Fall of the Bingham Dynasty” comes this little gem about our progressive newspaper publisher and his wife. Barry Sr. and his wife Mary Bingham (both deceased) regularly used the affectionate term “our dear n*gs” when referencing the hired help at their massive Glenview estate.

In another Bingham book called “House of Dreams,” it is noted that Mrs. Bingham had the family swimming pool drained after an African American son of their gardener took a swim in it. The Bingham’s sons Barry Jr. and Worth invited the teenager to swim, and were later stunned at their mother’s racist reaction.

Horrors! The University of Louisville couldn’t yank Papa John’s name off of its football stadium fast enough after John Schnatter used the n-word in a training call, but U of L proudly houses a Bingham named therapy center connected to its medical school.

Schnatter was referencing raw language used by KFC founder Col. Harland Sanders when he reportedly said the n-word. Papa John’s life was completely dismantled as the pizza company forced him off the property, revoked his chairman status, and scrubbed all references to him from its marketing. Papa John was ghosted by the very company he started all by himself.

Total double standard virtue signaling from a weak-kneed, over reactionary U of L administration. Bingham bucks are fine, Schnatter’s are not. Uh, OK.

About 100 years ago, the money to buy The Courier-Journal (and later WHAS Radio and WHAS Television) was acquired by Judge Robert Worth Bingham, a man deeply in debt and aware that his college girlfriend had just inherited $100 million. Just weeks after burying his wife Eleanor Bingham, Robert “Bob” Bingham was wooing the widow of the founder of Standard Oil.

How convenient. Bingham and Mary Kenan Flagler were soon married. They agreed that Bob would not be included in her will, all proceeds slated to return to her Kenan family of origin. That is, until the new Mrs. Bingham suddenly became addicted to morphine. She needed it for chronic pain from the syphilis her loving hubby gave her.

Once Mr. Bingham convinced the ailing Mrs. Bingham to sign a codicil granting him $5 million dollars from her vast estate, she was thoughtful enough to die not long thereafter.

WHAS building

The raw truth is that The Courier-Journal, WHAS Radio, WHAS-TV, and Standard Gravure (rotogravure printing) were funded by syphilis. So are the many philanthropic projects directed by the Bingham family.

Filthy rich but burdened with poor decision making, Mary Kenan Flagler Bingham had little chance against a scheming playa saddled with crippling debt.

Mary Kenan Flagler Bingham

Robert Worth Bingham, syphilitic media magnate

Should we crush the memories of 19th century greedy horndogs, Nation of Islam segregationists, or anyone who pursued the wrong cause, or used vile racist language over 100 years ago? Or fifty years ago?

In spite of the seedy acquisition of Bingham wealth, it did boost Louisville’s arts, health, and outdoor offerings. Must they be scrubbed from history like the pizza nitwit uttering a racist word?

Hell, no. The journey from 1776 to 2020 was lined with enlightenment, compassion, and willingness to change. Human enlightenment accelerated through the 1960s and has expanded mightily in recent years.

People stumble or use unsavory words in public that are ironically plentiful (and accepted) in music and theater arts.

Tribalism threatens to send everyone back to their specifically segregated segments of communities, and that is regression.

When sanity returns and human frailty is recognized, SJWs will be on the wrong side of history. Social Justice Warriors are the Senator Joe McCarthys of today. Their crusades to annihilate people are not unlike the Salem witch trials. Kill ’em first, check facts later.

Let people learn from their mistakes without eradicating their very existence just to make an accuser feel saintly. One finger pointing at another leaves four pointing back at you. Chooooo chooooo…and the karma train never forgets.