THE BEASMAN u of smell happy times
(cry) THIS HERE IS A NIGHTMARE TIME FOR US KENTUCKY WILDCATS! (cry) COACH CAL SUCKS AND U UH KAY ONLY GOT 8 SUPERSTARS AND WE CAINT BEAT SUCKY AUBURN! (cry) HOW COME WE DON’T GOT 15 MACK-DONNER ALL-AMERICOS? (cry) NOBODY TAWKIN UP BIG BLUE NATION BUT ERRBODY TAWKIN BOUT LAY-MAR JACKSON! (cry) I’M SICK OF HEARIN BOUT LAY-MAR IS THE GREATEST! (cry)

We surprised Lamar Jackson with a special video right after he won MVP.

His reaction is everything. @lj_era8 pic.twitter.com/VzeVLjBqcq

— NFL (@NFL) February 2, 2020

AND THEN YOU GOT THE BALDY MACK WINNIN STREAK FOR U OF SMELL BASKETBAW AND U OF SMELL’S #1 FAN BILL MURRAY IN THE SUPER BO COMMERCIAL. HOW COME ASHLEY JUGGS AIN’T ON NO SUPER BO COMMERCIAL SO U UH KAY CAN BRAG? (cry)

Nice! The #1 @LouisvilleMBB fan is spotlighted in one of the best #SuperBowl commercials. #GoCards https://t.co/2he8sFD1a8

— Terry Meiners (@terrymeiners) February 2, 2020

AND THEM CARDINAL GIRLS KEEP ON WINNIN AND MOVIN UP THE PO. (cry) DONNERVAN MITCHELL MAKES THE ALL-STAR TEAM BUT DEVLIN BROOKER GITS LEFT OUT. (cry) I CAINT TAKE ALL THIS HAPPY NEWS FOR U OF SMELL WHILE U UH KAY SUFFERS, LARRY MINNER. (cry)

MAYBE I GOT ROOF-EED! YEAH! I HOPE SOMEBODY SPIKED MY YOOHOO DRINK AND ALL THIS GOOD NEWS FOR U OF SMELLERS IS JUST A REAL BAD DREAM! (cry) STOP THAT SMIRKING, LARRY MINNER, YOU BALD HAIRED, TRAITOR TURNCOAT, U OF SMELL BOOTLICKER! (cry)

AND DON’T EVEN TAWK ABOUT THE TOP TWUNNY FIVE PO…THE CATS KEEP FALLIN AND NOW THEY SAY WE GONNA GIT LUCKY TO BE A 4 SEED! (cry) THIS HERE IS A TRAIN WRECK, DADGUMMIT! COACH CAL CAINT COACH!

🗣 @UKCoachCalipari: "Here’s what I said after: ‘we all had a bad day – me included … But give Auburn the credit. They were more physical. They created more fouls than us, obviously. And the crazy thing is we had our chance." pic.twitter.com/YLenon8cGX

— Kentucky Basketball (@KentuckyMBB) February 2, 2020

I MEAN, COME ON…THE GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCATS JUST LOSTED TO AUBURN, WHAT IS COACHED BY SWEATY BRUCE PEARL! HE SUCKS BUT HE SOMEHOW GOT COACH CAL’S NUMBER! OL COACH CAL AFTER THE GAME SAYS AUBURN WAS MORE PHYSICAL AND THEY WANTED IT MORE AND THEY FOUGHT HARDER! WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS YOUR JOB? TO GIT KENTUCKY DOIN ALL THEM THANGS, YOU SMOOTH TALKIN, SLICK HAIRED, I-TALIAN DISSERPOINTMENT! (cry)

COACH CAL IS SO BUSY RUNNIN TO MASS EVER DAY AND THEN SETTIN AROUND DUNKIN DONUTS EATIN CRULLERS INSTEAD OF FIGGERIN OUT HOW TO COACH OUR #1 RECRUITIN CLASSES. GIT OFF YOUR FAT I-TALIAN KEISTER AND LEARN OUR WILDCATS HOW TO WIN! WE GIT BIGTIME REE-CRUITS LIKE NICK DICKS AND NATE THE SISTERN AND ASHLEY HAGGINS AND I-M-NOT-THAT-QUICKLEY AND THEN THEY SUCK COME TOURNEYMINT TIME! (cry)

WE GOT TO LOOK AT REE-PLACIN COACH CAL WITH KINNY SKY WALKER, DADGUMMIT! EVERBODY KNOWS THAT SWEATY BRUCE PEARL PAYS OFF THEM REFFERMARIES SO HOW COME COACH CAL DON’T DO THAT? HE GITS PAID THE MOST SO HE NEEDS TO START GREASING THEM ZEBRA PALMS, YOU KNUCKLEHEAD! (cry) ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS IS GITTIN TEASED BY DIS-GUSTIN U OF SMELL FANS CUZ THEY’S WINNIN AND WE AIN’T! WE THROW THEM Ls DOWN AND U OF SMELLERS JUST LAUGH AT US AND SAY WE IS MAKIN SEVENS WITH OUR HANDS! (cry)

WHAT HAPPENED TO U UH KAY DOMMERATION? ONCE EVANSVILLE BEAT US WE SHOULDA FIRED COACH CAL BUT NAWWWWW…WE KEEP THINKIN HE GONNA FIGGER IT OUT AND MAKE OUR BIGTIME RECRUITS INTO CHAMPEENS. BUT HE DON’T! (cry) SO NOW THE SUPER BO IS OVER AND IT SHOULD BE ERRBODY TAWKIN BOUT U UH KAY GONNA WIN THE NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIPS, BUT NAWWW…THEY TAWKIN BOUT LAY-MAR JACKSON THIS AND LAY-MAR JACKSON THAT!

"You have to have confidence in yourself. Some people might say it's cocky, but you know what you're capable of. Sky's the limit." @Lj_era8 reacts to being named MVP.

📺: NFL Honors 8 p.m. on FOX pic.twitter.com/QfAMsAa7zo

— Baltimore Ravens (@Ravens) February 2, 2020

DADGUMMIT, I HAD TO TURN OFF THE SUPER BO WHEN THEY HAD LAY-MAR JACKSON DOIN THE COIN TOSS, KISSIN ALL THE CHEERLEADERS, AND THEN SHOWIN HIS NFL M.V.P. TROPHY TO PATRICK MAHOMES AND JIMMY G! SHUT UP ABOUT LAY-MAR! WHO WON? THEY PROLLY DIN’T EVEN GIT TO HOLD THE SUPER BO TROPHY CUZ THE COMMISSIONER HANDED IT TO LAY-MAR JACKSON AND SAID HE DESERVED IT MORE. U OF SMELL IS GITTIN TOO MUCH GOOD NEWS AND U UH KAY AIN’T. ONE OF YOUR PLAYERS OR COACHES NEED TO GIT IN SEX TROUBLE AGIN SO US GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY FANS CAN START BEIN HAPPY AGAIN!

WE’S HALF WORRIED LAY-MAR JACKSON GONNA GIT ELECTED PRESIDENT WITH BILL MURRAY AS HIS RUNNIN MATE AND THE TWO OF EM PAINTIN THE WHITE HOUSE RED! THIS GOTTA STOP RIGHT NOW! COME ON, ASHLEY JUGGS! GIT MORE FAMOUSER AND COME SEE ABOUT IT! WE IS THE CATS! IT AIN’T POSED TO BE LIKE THIS!