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The Beasman can’t kiss Coach Cal on his 60th because only U of Smell coaches mess around

THE BEASMAN cats rolling and duke is coming for u of smell
HOW YOU DOIN, LARRY MINNER? SURELY ALL YOU SNAGGLE TOOTH CARDINAL FANS IS COMIN UP WITH GOOD EXCUSES FOR WHY DUKE BEAT YOUR BRAINS OUT. (laffs) LARRY, Y’ALL NEED TO LEARN HOW TO CHEAT LIKE DUKE DOES, YOU KNOW, LIKE PAYIN OFF ZION WILLIAMSTON AND NEVER GITTIN CAUGHT LIKE Y’ALL DONE DID WITH BRIAN BLOWHARD. (laffs)

LARRY, IF YOU GONNA PAY OFF PLAYERS, AT LEAST PAY OFF THE GOOD ONES! (laffs) AST COACH CAL! HE TAKES THEIR MOMS TO CHURCH AND LET’S EM KEEP THE COLLECTION PLATE AFTER A BUNCH OF BOOSTERS PUT SPECIAL ENVERLOPES IN THERE. (laffs) WAKE UP, LARRY! DUKE BOUT TO CRUSH YOUR CARDINAL DREAMS FOR GOOD! (laffs) ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS CAINT WAIT TO SEE DUKE KNOCK YOUR CARDINAL TEETH OUT AND SEND Y’ALL PACKIN FOR THE N.I.T. (laffs)

photos via Kentucky Athletics

DID YOU SEE COACH CAL AND CATS DOWN THERE IN REDNECK STARKVILLE? DADGUMMIT, WE WAS JUST TOYIN WITH THEM MISTERSIPPI HILLJACKS WHEN WE LET ‘EM GIT BACK CLOSE TO US THEN WE TURNT ON THE GAS AND BEAT EM DOWN! CATS IS INCHIN UP TO #1, LARRY MINNER, AND THERE AIN’T NOTHIN YOU CARDINAL FRAUDS CAN DO BUT CRY ABOUT IT. (laffs) I SEEN HOW THE NC2A PUT OUT THAT CHART SHOWIN U UH KAY AS A #2 SEED AND U OF SMELL AS A #4 SEED. WHAT A JOKE!

photo via Louisville Athletics

U OF SMELL DONE LOST TO NOBODY FLORIDER STATE AND NOW Y’ALL GONNA GIT STOMPED BY THEM DOOKIES AND THEN VIRGINNY GONNA KICK YOU IN THE FACE AGAIN. THE U OF SMELL WALK OF SHAME IS ON! (laffs) I LOVE IT. Y’ALL THUNK YOU WAS GONNA BE A 4 SEED WITH BALDY CHRIS MACK AND HIS BAD NEWS BEARS BUT AFTER THE NEXT TWO WEEKS OF BEATDOWNS…HELLO N.I.T. (laffs) MEANTIME THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS GOT CAL-ENTINE’S DAY AGAINST NOBODY L.S. WHO AND SO WE CAINT LOSE. Y’ALL GIRLS CAN BLOW KISSES AT COACH CAL ON CAL-ENTINE’S DAY BUT HE WON’T DO NO BOOGALOO WITH YOU LIKE A U OF SMELL COACH WOULD DO CUZ COACH CAL AIN’T NO TOMCAT. HE’S A WILDCAT! (laffs)

photo via Twitter

THEN U UH KAY GOT TENNERSEE COMIN UP TWO TIMES AND SO WE CAN BEE-OTCH SLAP THEM AND TAKE THEIR #1 SEED. I LOVE IT. LARRY, YOU CARDINAL FANS JUST GOTTA GO BACK AND ACT LIKE YOU CARE ABOUT GIRLS BASKETBAW CUZ BALDY MACK IS SLIPPING DOWN LIKE A STRIPPER ON A U OF SMELL DARMITORY POLE. (laffs) FACE IT, CARDINAL FANS. Y’ALL AIN’T PAID FOR YOUR SINS YET. THE F.B.I. COULD COME BACK AND ARREST EVERBODY ANY DAY NOW. MEANWHILE COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – HE SAYS THE CATS IS PEAKIN AT JUST THE RIGHT TIME. AND SO IS HE. COACH CAL TURNT THE BIG 6-0 AND HIS WIFE WENT ON THE TWITTER MACHINE AND TODE EVERBODY HE’S A LOYAL HUSBAND WHO HAS HONESTY AND INTERGRITY. WHO DO YOU THINK SHE WAS MAKIN FUN OF, LARRY MINNER? YOUR BOYFRIEND SLICK RICK BUTEENER, THAT’S WHO! (laffs)

via Twitter

EVEN MRS. COACH CAL KNOWS HOW TO THROW SHADE AT U OF SMELL’S SHAMEFUL COACH WHO GOT RUN OUTTA THE COUNTRY SO THIS HERE BALD GUY FROM CINCINNAPLISS COULD COME IN HERE AND TRY TO GLUE ALL THE PIECES OF A SHATTERED U OF SMELL PROGRUM! (laffs) I LOVE IT, MRS COACH CAL. NEXT TIME MAKE FUN OF LARRY MINNER ON THE TWITTER TWAT MACHINE! LARRY IS A TRAITOR TURNCOAT WHO WOULD NARMALLY BE CELERMABRATING COACH CAL’S BIRTHDAY BY DONATIN TO SOME U UH KAY BOOSTER PROGRUM BUT NAWWWW….OL LARRY DONE CROSSED THE TRACKS AND SO NOW HE SPENDS EVER MARCH IN THE N.I.T. WISHIN HE WAS STILL BIG BLUE! (laffs)

Mike, Terry, Lisa, and Lynn Meiners (November 2018)

TOO BAD, SO SAD! LARRY…YOU GONNA LOVE THE N.I.T. THIS YEAR. IT’S GONNA BE PLAYED AT SHAWNEE PARK ON THE DIRT BOWL COURTS. THAT’S PERFECT, CUZ U OF SMELL STILL GOT DIRT ALL OVER EM FROM STRIPPERS AND PAYOFFS, YOU BUNCH OF SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, NECK TATTOO, WELFARE STAMP, WHISKEY FOR BREAKFAST, GRAFFITI PAINTIN, BRAINLESS, SPINELESS, TOOTHLESS, G.E.D. FLUNKIN, TRAILER TRASH, STRIPPER POLE SWINGERS! GROW SOME MORALS, SON. EASTER IS COMIN! AWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS!

terrymeiners
dad. husband. observer. media personality. pathological flyer.
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